EMPOWERED IN KNOWING

A six centimeter tumor was removed from me three days ago. The specimen was immediately rushed to the pathologist and thirty minutes later, they called my surgeons in the operating room. It's malignant.

After receiving the results, my surgeons proceeded to remove fourteen lymph nodes from my right axilla. Subsequently, twelve of the fourteen nodes tested positive for malignancy.

Today, I am safely home. It's my daughter's birthday and we are all trying to find normalcy in the day. I am a little uncomfortable because of the drain that is still attached to me, but overall I am strangely feeling empowered.

Looking back to D-day...

I can still distinctly remember falling asleep in the operating room to the sound of my anesthesiologist singing to herself. Just moments before that, my cousin and internist came in to take my picture with her cellular phone. After what seemed to be only a few moments, I woke up again to the voice of my anesthesiologist saying that it's all over. In reality it was after eight hours. I was groggy but could feel a slight pain in my throat, probably after the breathing tube was pulled out from me.

The next moment I remember was waking up again, this time in the recovery room. My husband was telling me, They had to take it all out, it's cancer. Our son is here beside me. I then turned to look for my boy and saw that he was crying.

I remember reaching out to him and saying, It's okay son, don't worry. We'll be okay.

Now that I know I have cancer, at least I know what I am contending with. It feels much, much better than not knowing what I am up against.